Add all the ingredients meant for the paste to the mixie and grind it into a soft paste without adding water.
Heat oil in a pan, add Okra pieces and some salt. Cover and fry them crisply on a high flame. Keep stirring and remove from fire after they are fried.
Heat some more oil in the same pan and add mustard seeds, green chillies, dry red chillies and cumin seeds and fry them well.
Add ginger, turmeric and curry leaves to the same seasoning, sprinkle some asafoetida, and fry more.
When the ginger is fried, add the Bengal Gram-Coconut paste. Keep a little paste aside.
Fry the Bengal Gram paste a little, then add some water and let it boil.
Add the Bengal Gram paste to the beaten curds. Put the paste in the pan, add half-a-liter of water and salt, whisk it thoroughly to prevent balling, and let it boil just once on a low flame.
Once the buttermilk with Bengal gram boils, add the fried Okra pieces, chopped coriander leaves. Cover it and let it cook for 3-4 minutes and then remove it from the fire.